KitchenAid mixers and a night in Rome

A few years ago, I had a friend who signed up for a bridal registry and put an Xbox on it.

I’m not sure if he got it — but it did get me thinking.

I’ve never been a fan of registries. I get the point of them — to make it easier for guests to pick out the perfect gift and to ensure the recipients actually like what they get. It’s brilliant, really.

But I don’t like the idea of telling people 1) “Buy me a gift” and 2) “Since you’re going to buy me a gift, buy me something I really want, OK?”

Now that I’m getting married, people have been asking if I’m registered somewhere other than the Department of Health.

The thing is, we don’t really need anything. We’ve been living together for the past two years — with the exception of lately, as he’s in Wisconsin — so we have towels, sheets, plates, utensils and a nifty rice cooker. All the things we don’t need but want are too expensive and in the realm of Xbox.

There’s been a trend lately — probably because many couples shack up before getting married — to register or request non-traditional wedding gifts. Like “honeymoon” gifts of hotel stays and help with airfare. I even found this Foodie Registry, started by a couple in Chicago who thought people may want romantic nights out instead of another blender.

So I’m tossing it out there: what should I put on my registry? And if you could make one now — whether you’re married or not — what would you put on it?

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11 Responses to “KitchenAid mixers and a night in Rome”

  1. David Jackson March 22, 2012 at 2:56 am #

    Go with the flow, create a registry so people can shop for you. Otherwise elope. As for what would I put on my registry if doing it all over again?

    1) Callaway Fit Driver and 3 wood
    2) Callaway 2-3 Hybrid Tour edition please
    3) Nike Method putter 3i preferred
    4) 9 foot board… hey it is all this haole can ride anyways
    5) if you rich Nacra F20 Carbon… just park it at Kokokahi
    6) if you supah rich… Lamborghini Aventador prefer a grey one with black interior
    7) if you ain’t got squat… a gift certificate to Smorgy’s
    8) if you got less than squat… a $5.00 gift card for Starbucks
    9) if you wish you had squat… buy me a spam musubi at 7-11
    10) if you got as much as I do… skip it brah… see you under the bridge :)

    • jaydee March 22, 2012 at 5:19 am #

      I like those choices David!

  2. kalei March 22, 2012 at 3:47 am #

    We didn’t register and I think we even said no gifts, but no one listens in Hawaii anyway. I think we received monetary gifts from a few people (which is nice but you don’t ask for money right? :)). Sometimes the money was for specific things, meaning the gift giver suggested what we should use the money for. One gift. given to us by a group of people, was money for a weekend getaway at a ryokan (we were moving to Japan), which is ten times more expensive than a nice pot/pan set, and thousand times more exciting.

    People will want to get you things and it’s much easier for them if you register, but if you don’t need or want anything, no point in getting a bunch of “stuff” unless you have a big empty house. If there are a few things you still need then go for it. I’d suggest the best german knife or a set if you have young or non-traditional guests who don’t mind giving sharp objects:)

  3. islandgirlinnc March 22, 2012 at 4:29 am #

    We had a traditional registry. We had only lived together for a few months before getting married. It was nice to get a nicer set of utensils, some nice china (which unfortunately we have never used!), a nice rice cooker, KitchenAid mixer, etc. If you have nice things already, then I would opt for something different. If you truly don’t want people giving you gifts, you can set up a charity for donations in lieu of gifts. There are registries like you mentioned about putting money toward the honeymoon or some type like it. I’m not sure I would blatantly ask for money for my honeymoon. Like the previous poster said, many people in Hawaii give money, so you can probably count on that to some extent. If your close family members ask what you want (i.e. parents, grandparents, siblings), then I would be more specific and say you want money for the honeymoon, etc.

  4. matt March 22, 2012 at 6:04 am #

    on the flip side, if you don’t register, you’ll get a mixture of money, mismatched dishes and flatwear (often found on the clearance aisle at Ross), re-gifted soap/candle sets, and other assorted junks.

    the best strategy, even if you don’t “want” or “need” anything is to register. go to macy’s or bed bath and beyond and bust out the wand (macy’s a better option for reasons that I’ll explain later). when you’re there, register for everything. small things, big things (who knows, you might get lucky), stuff you’ve always wanted and stuff you never thought you wanted but could see yourself wanting now that you know about it. make sure there’s lots of sets of smaller items.

    when it comes time to buy your gift, people will look to your registry. if there’s something they can afford (or, if it’s cheaper than they were thinking of spending, many people will bundle a couple of smaller items together to get a price appropriate gift). like I said earlier, sometimes you’ll get lucky and have one person pick up that kitchen aid stand mixer with all the accessories, but often, the things left on your registry will be the bigger ticket items. no sweat, as long as there’s enough smaller ticket items to go around. if people can’t find something in their price range on your registry, they’ll sometimes go the Ross route and get you some mismatched china set.

    now, here’s the awesome part. you get your gifts and separate them into the must keep and return piles. fill the car and drop it off at Macy’s for a big old gift card. if you play your cards right, this will often be in the thousands of dollars range. now, if there’s any big ticket items you want, you can use this gift card to purchase them (when i got married, they used to give you ten or fifteen percent off registry items for a month or so after the event…not sure if they still do this). or, you can use the store credit for whatever. we got our sofa/loveseat set by doing this and still had credit left over to cover a couple of wedding gifts for events that we went to over the next couple of years.

    it sounds cutthroat but you gotta do what you gotta do to ensure that you aren’t the recipient of the twelve piece floral dish set and mismatched flatwear that’s been sitting in your calabash cousin’s closet since she got married.

  5. M March 22, 2012 at 6:42 am #

    Hello Cat!

    A 4 bedroom 4 bath house or money….

  6. Annoddah Dave March 22, 2012 at 7:00 am #

    CAT: Start your own registry on your blog, twitter, facebook, etc. eg., CAT’s Wedding Registry: 1. cash, 2. Savings Bond, 3. Check, 4. Longs Gift Card, 5. Safeway, Times, Foodland gift card, 6. Years supply of TP, 7. Doggy tux for my dogs to attend wedding, 8. GMT coupon book, 9. Cast Iron chicken fryer , 10. a set of hashi with silver tips

  7. Randi March 22, 2012 at 11:54 am #

    Even if you have a registry, you will still receive tons of household items you don’t want, don’t need, and never knew existed. I still don’t know what to do with crystal candle stick votives and gold plated champagne flutes.

    I had a friend that did a honeymoon registry. It was basically people gifted money to a pool that was used toward a planned itinerary airfare, lodging, dining, and activities. They were going to pay for it anyway, so I rationalized that any amount was appreciated, and it was something they wanted!

  8. 808pooh March 22, 2012 at 12:40 pm #

    getting married? When did you get engaged? christmas? new years? I would always read your blogs on nonstop but when you left i stopped reading. I finally made it to the catdish and now i read a whole bunch of blogs i missed.
    I hope everything will turn out for the BEST for the both of you! oh and for sunny and indy.

  9. WildeOscar March 22, 2012 at 1:53 pm #

    First got married at 23, she was 22. Don’t even want to think about that one. Traditional registry, but what we needed was a good counseling session to tell us not to go through with it.

    Second trip down the aisle at 32, her 31. Church wedding and traditional reception. It was a long-distance romance, so I had little knowledge of many of the arrangements, including registry and gifts. I did take responsibility for many things, but we did them separately.

    If I was getting married now for for the first time, I really wouldn’t want gifts at all, probably not a church wedding, just throw a party for our families and friends. No registry anywhere.

  10. Cody Zamboni March 22, 2012 at 7:23 pm #

    I didn’t know what a bridal registry was.
    You make a list of stuff you want ??
    Really ??
    Like at Xmas making a list of what you want so you can ask Santa Claus ??

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